last night i woke up because two dudes were fighting underneath my window and one dude kept screaming “BRO!! BRO YOU CALLED ME A BITCH IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE BAR BRO!! THE WHOLE BAR!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT BRO??” he sounded so heart broken. why bro. why did you do this.

(via californicatinq)


i can relate to pirates because i too am after the booty

(Source: mulderplease, via elkingpirate)


don’t stare at the moon too long or else you’ll remember that nothing in this stupid fucking world makes sense

(via non-morti)


I like new friends because I can reuse old jokes

(via krazfizz)